Medicine*Music*Chocolate*Life

Deja-Vu; please let it not be.

I remember how it felt. I can't even explain it. The 6,000-odd of us who battled it together.....are the only ones who can feel my terror. I locked eyes with some last night, and the same weary fear is there.

I'm actually crying. I remember my last thumbs-up to that bright and shining boy who never left the hospital. I remember the look on his sister's face. We can do better than that. We must.

The company dinner

Tonight is the company dinner, and we're going as MIBs. The Boss will look a treat.

I'll be rockin' my YSL catseye black plastic shades, slicked-back hair, Polo Ralph Lauren strong-shouldered double-breasted boxy black jacket (worn open), a black ribbed cotton and tulle Banana Republic singlet, ubiquitous black leggings (from Warehouse 3 years ago!), and those 10-year-old Karl Lagerfeld shoes with the silver alien heel and ankle strap. A silver chain around my neck, diamond studs in ears, and two tennis bracelets (for irreverent diamonds!) on the right wrist. Bag is the issue. My old steady, the straw Baguette with diamante logo closure and patent black strap, or the lipstick-red Valentino knock-off clutch?

If only it returns to normal....

Thank You. You heard me, and You haven't even sent me any dreams to indicate what the payback will be. Do I go back into my old work? Do I embark on a different course of mind?

I know it's not over yet; there is still so far to go. But things are better by just that much. Just enough to make a really big difference.

I remain hopeful. And apprehensive. Waiting for Your message.

Plenty on ze plate

Back from abroad a week ago. Have brought the problem closer to home, in order to manage it better. I'm worried, and rather heartsick. You know that feeling you get when you know you're about to lose someone, and there's not a damn thing you can do about it? It's like that, and agonisingly anguishing.

It's the tail end of the Good Friday/Easter long weekend, I enjoyed this one immensely, despite familial woes (one has to learn to separate feelings for each person, or be consumed by overriding emotion). Took Bean swimming. She absolutely loves the water.

She went into the baby pool with Hubby on Friday. I cheered from the side, camera in hand. Captured some really good shots and videos. Then a bath, warm milk, and nap.

This morning, I went in with her. Hubby took off to yoga class (he's getting a bad back from hunching over surgery). We played a new game. I swam her from side to side of the baby pool, just the same way that we do laps, but upon reaching each side I lifted her up to sit on the edge, counted "One!....Two!...." and on "...Threeeee!...." swooped her into the water in a pseudo-dive. She laughed her squeally baby laugh, exposing both little front teeth as well as her sharp little dimples.

Right now, she's nestled up against my bosom, sipping milk and dozing off - after a warm shower together, and a little baby massage.

On Friday morning after Hubby swam with Bean, I took Mom to the huge Giant hypermart in Tampines. Amazing selection of really fresh food. It was so comprehensive that there is an entire fishmarket in there, with live tiger prawns and sushi chefs! We bought loads. It was really good bonding because I hardly ever get time alone with my mum. It is SO totally true as well, the saying "Before I was a mother, I loved my mum but never understood her".

In the afternoon, took Ella (with Bean and Annie in tow) to Taka. Poor gal was trying to find pairs of shoes for her wedding gowns, but couldn't walk far as she had injured her foot. We did manage to slowly cover plenty of ground though. From Vuitton, Chanel, to Dior and Fendi. A tad Celine, Gucci.....and On Pedder. After absorbing ideas galore, she found a much more affordable but no less bedazzling option in Taka's departmental store. Annie was handling Bean but also stole glances at some items....only to whisper to me later that she was horrified that a pair of shoes cost as much as a house back in her village!

We dropped off Bean and Annie after that, and had dinner with Shay and Sukie at relative newcomer Spruce, followed by desserts at Laurent Bernard @ Portsdown Road. The meat at Spruce is FAB although desserts were a disappointment.

Yesterday, Hubby and I went with his folks to pay our annual respects to his departed paternal grandparents. It is known as Ching Ming and you can Wiki it for a lot more information and links. Suffice to say that it is the day that we visit the graves of our dear departed and tend to them. We clear weeds, generally clean up, and then set out a meal of offerings to them, burn incense, and then burn paper replicas of the things we want to buy for them e.g. clothes, credit card, mahjong table etc.

After that we went to dinner at a popular mixed-dialect restaurant - cold crab, chicken in red vinegar, prawn in pastry sheets, smoked duck etc.

Last night, Hubby and I went to new watering hole Orgo, with 3 cute japanese mixologists (they rotate quarterly from Japan) making stuff so fresh that I actually felt healthy drinking them. VERY highly-recommended!

In a half hour, we'll be lunching with Hubby's folks at the newest Malaysian import: 7Ate9 @ the Esplanade.....and tonight, we'll eat with my folks @ Tanamera Country Club. Wee!